Oh, this is a juicy topic. It is of the hour. I am so fascinated by our desire as human beings to put others on a pedestal, to give our power away in order to feel some peace, some respite from our suffering, some lasting joy.
I did it. Beginning with my mother, for a long long time, then with “mother figures" like Sai Maa, and Anita, then with “father figures” like Wayne and with priests in the Catholic church growing up. I did it with men. Oh did I ever betray myself in my teens and my twenties, when I crossed the boundary line between “I want to share love with you” and “this is not ok but I can't remember where to find my voice”. I even did it with Paul to some extent. It is hard-wired in me, conditioned deep in my cells, to feel like another has my answers, another holds my worth, the key to my success, to my ultimate happiness.
Sometimes these happenings have opened up doors within myself and gave me access to more profound dimensions of life. I saw with my own eyes my father’s heart being cracked open with one single hug from Sai Maa; I can’t deny the depth of the experience of unconditional love I felt when Wayne listened to my every word, seeing the deeper and truer essence of me; I know how powerful the acceleration of vibration feels inside when in the presence of a human who has accelerated their own vibration to such a place that we can, in their proximity, attune with divine love, and grace; and I know how much I have grown into myself from Anita’s self-love message, how incredibly powerful she is on stage, reminding everyone of their innate beauty. For those experiences I am so grateful.
But my conclusion is this: ultimately, I do not access lasting joy, healing nor inner peace when the source of these things lay outside of myself. Each experience have convinced me more and more how important it is to bring these figures down from the pedestal and at eye level; everyone and anyone we place up there, the people with whom we feel less then, even if we think it’s for our own good, and to KNOW that we are "’that” which we admire in them.
We are IT. We are the universe, we are god, we are the sun and the moon, the ocean and the volcanoes, the light and the dark, the fears and the exuberance… all of it. The journey of the soul in human form is to fully OWN and FEEL the experience of that HUGENESS. Yes, we can be inspired by a teacher or an artist that speaks a truth that resonates with us, that awakens us. Absolutely! That is why we are here, to uplift each other, to walk together. But we should always take that truth back inside, to bounce it off against our inner truth compass, and know that the teacher doesn’t hold anything we don't have and that learning how to DISCERN truth within (not without) is the ultimate gift of love and freedom.
The role of a teacher is to nurture the leader and teacher in others, not to gain followers, and not to indulge in the pedestal thing. What we need today are leaders, everyday people, who are self-examined, self-responsible, and self-accountable, people who are able to honour the personal and move through to the impersonal of the issue, to share with others authentic stories and expanded tools of “self, soul, and source awareness” so individuals can embody their own wholeness, lead themselves into emotional and spiritual autonomy, and be empowered by their own knowing, independent of the teacher, and perhaps inspire others to do the same.
Being immersed in a powerful spiritual context like religion, just like being immersed in a powerful social context like the film industry or politics for example, especially if it’s from a very young age, it is incredibly complex within oneself to find the discernment of truth, personal or universal, in the face of the authority figures, alive or dead, in that context. To the individuals who are emerging with powerful truths, with such courage, clarity, determination, love, and perspective … I am so incredibly inspired by you. You are the medicine we need right now. The leadership we need. These accounts, experiences, and testimonials are life-changing, mountain moving. Not just for the storyteller, but for all who are witnessing and have, in some way or another, experienced abuse at the hands of authority figures. Including me. To you, I say thank you. And how can I help.