When what used to work doesn't anymore, including our spiritual practices, it's an invitation to expand to a new level of consciousness.
Looking back, I can see how many times I have been hard on myself when a practice stopped working. It has been patterns of not trusting, of wanting to control, of holding on tight to the way things are, and of forgetting my essential nature as the sacred and creative emergent source.
It took me time, after my car accident in 2001, to understand the intelligence in it happening. I was injured physically, but it also shook me emotionally. I found myself dependent on others and needing to accept their help. My understanding of love at the time was transactional. In my mind, love always came with conditions. So if I asked for help, I'd expose my vulnerability and open myself up for a dynamic I didn't want to engage in. I was afraid that my inability to navigate it would lead to me losing my freedom in some way. And if I accepted...
